Mad Micks Meanderings

Twilight

2009-01-07T13:48:00.004+11:00

Quick post whilst reading the "Twilight" saga by Stephenie Meyer.

This is a love story for teenage girls. I am a 56 year old male so it might be a bit outside my league.

One thing in "Eclipse" just triggered a thought that had been building for a while. Just one word! And that word is "Clearwater".

There is a female Clearwater in another epic (non Vampire) 6 volume series and she is also part of a love triangle between Steve and Cadillac. Totally different (and the Clearwater in Twilight is not a major character) but I had been thinking of this triangle whilst reading these books. And I am not going to divulge the books or Author - till later anyhow.

Maybe later after I finish the series ( I have to even though I am getting annoyed with it's I LOVE YOU NO MATTER WHAT theme).

The movie was crap so do not watch it. Glad I didn't pay to see it at the movies because if I had it would have been the Movie Companies actually stealing from me. Wonder if you can get your money back if the movie is not what it is supposed to be?

Rahab

2008-08-27T09:45:00.003+10:00

This is a long post but interesting none the less.

Currently at church and Bible study we are working our way through Joshua (great book) and one person intrigued me - Rahab.

Basically Rahab was a Canaanite in Jericho, she was a prostitute and hid the spies that Joshua had sent into Jericho to see what was happening. She lied to the king about were the spies were and because of her faithfulness and trust in the Lord her and her family were the only ones in Jericho who were saved. She married one of the Israelites (Salmon) and appears in the genealogy of Jesus Christ.

My problem was why was she allowed to live when God had clearly stated that all Canaanites we to be killed.

So here follows some quotes from the bible and other interesting stuff:

All quotes are from the NIV

Firstly: Gods orders to the Israelites regarding Canaan and other peoples:

Deuteronomy 7:1-5 1 When the LORD your God brings you into the land you are entering to possess and drives out before you many nations-- the Hittites, Girgashites, Amorites, Canaanites, Perizzites, Hivites and Jebusites, seven nations larger and stronger than you—2 and when the LORD your God has delivered them over to you and you have defeated them, then you must destroy them totally. Make no treaty with them, and show them no mercy. 3 Do not intermarry with them. Do not give your daughters to their sons or take their daughters for your sons, 4 for they will turn your sons away from following me to serve other gods, and the LORD's anger will burn against you and will quickly destroy you. 5 This is what you are to do to them: Break down their altars, smash their sacred stones, cut down their Asherah poles and burn their idols in the fire.

Pretty clear on the subject about what to do with them I think. Then later in Deuteronomy we have this interesting bit:

Deuteronomy 21:10-14 10 When you go to war against your enemies and the LORD your God delivers them into your hands and you take captives, 11 if you notice among the captives a beautiful woman and are attracted to her, you may take her as your wife. 12 Bring her into your home and have her shave her head, trim her nails 13 and put aside the clothes she was wearing when captured. After she has lived in your house and mourned her father and mother for a full month, then you may go to her and be her husband and she shall be your wife. 14 If you are not pleased with her, let her go wherever she wishes. You must not sell her or treat her as a slave, since you have dishonored her.

Here we have God allowing them to intermarry if they find a woman that pleases them. Could this override the previous verses. I don’t think so because he expressly says they are not to intermarry with the Canaanites.

Lets bring Rahab in:

Joshua 2:1-6 1 Then Joshua son of Nun secretly sent two spies from Shittim. "Go, look over the land," he said, "especially Jericho." So they went and entered the house of a prostitute named Rahab and stayed there. 2 The king of Jericho was told, "Look! Some of the Israelites have come here tonight to spy out the land." 3 So the king of Jericho sent this message to Rahab: "Bring out the men who came to you and entered your house, because they have come to spy out the whole land." 4 But the woman had taken the two men and hidden them. She said, "Yes, the men came to me, but I did not know where they had come from. 5 At dusk, when it was time to close the city gate, the men left. I don't know which way they went. Go after them quickly. You may catch up with them." 6 (But she had taken them up to the roof and hidden them under the stalks of flax she had laid out on the roof.)

The fact she is a prostitute, lied to the king and hid the spies.

Joshua 2:8-21 8 Before the spies lay down for the night, she went up on the roof 9 and said to them, "I know that the LORD has given this land to you and that a great fear of you has fallen on us, so that all who live in this country are melting in fear because of you. 10 We have heard how the LORD dried up the water of the Red Sea for you when you came out of Egypt, and what you did to Sihon and Og, the two kings of the Amorites east of the Jordan, whom you completely destroyed. 11When we heard of it, our hearts melted and everyone's courage failed because of you, for the LORD your God is God in heaven above and on the earth below. 12 Now then, please swear to me by the LORD that you will show kindness to my family, because I have shown kindness to you. Give me a sure sign 13 that you will spare the lives of my father and mother, my brothers and sisters, and all who belong to them, and that you will save us from death." 14 "Our lives for your lives!" the men assured her. "If you don't tell what we are doing, we will treat you kindly and faithfully when the LORD gives us the land." 15 So she let them down by a rope through the window, for the house she lived in was part of the city wall. 16 Now she had said to them, "Go to the hills so the pursuers will not find you. Hide yourselves there three days until they return, and then go on your way." 17 The men said to her, "This oath you made us swear will not be binding on us 18 unless, when we enter the land, you have tied this scarlet cord in the window through which you let us down, and unless you have brought your father and mother, your brothers and all your family into your house. 19 If anyone goes outside your house into the street, his blood will be on his own head; we will not be responsible. As for anyone who is in the house with you, his blood will be on our head if a hand is laid on him. 20 But if you tell what we are doing, we will be released from the oath you made us swear." 21 "Agreed," she replied. "Let it be as you say." So she sent them away and they departed. And she tied the scarlet cord in the window.

So here we find out she (and all the Canaanites) had heard what God could do and they were all melting in fear. Rahab here decides to side with the side of Good. This melting also fulfils a prophecy:

Exodus 15:15-16 15 The chiefs of Edom will be terrified, the leaders of Moab will be seized with trembling, the people of Canaan will melt away; 16 terror and dread will fall upon them. By the power of your arm they will be as still as a stone-- until your people pass by, O LORD, until the people you bought pass by.

Back to Rahab. She keeps her promise, all of Jericho is destroyed and she and her family are saved:

Joshua 6:20-23 20 When the trumpets sounded, the people shouted, and at the sound of the trumpet, when the people gave a loud shout, the wall collapsed; so every man charged straight in, and they took the city. 21 They devoted the city to the LORD and destroyed with the sword every living thing in it-- men and women, young and old, cattle, sheep and donkeys. 22 Joshua said to the two men who had spied out the land, "Go into the prostitute's house and bring her out and all who belong to her, in accordance with your oath to her." 23 So the young men who had done the spying went in and brought out Rahab, her father and mother and brothers and all who belonged to her. They brought out her entire family and put them in a place outside the camp of Israel.

Jericho is destroyed and Rahab and her family are saved and left outside the camp of the Israelites. Why? Because she is not an Israelite and cannot be included withem or even get be too near the Ark of the Covenant that is at the centre of the Israelites camp.

And:

Joshua 6:24-25 24 Then they burned the whole city and everything in it, but they put the silver and gold and the articles of bronze and iron into the treasury of the LORD's house. 25 But Joshua spared Rahab the prostitute, with her family and all who belonged to her, because she hid the men Joshua had sent as spies to Jericho-- and she lives among the Israelites to this day.

So Rahab has been spared (along with her family) and now lives with the Israelites. So what happened and why was she saved? Now to the New Testament:

Hebrews 11:31 By faith the prostitute Rahab, because she welcomed the spies, was not killed with those who were disobedient.

James 2:24-26 24 You see that a person is justified by what he does and not by faith alone. 25 In the same way, was not even Rahab the prostitute considered righteous for what she did when she gave lodging to the spies and sent them off in a different direction? 26 As the body without the spirit is dead, so faith without deeds is dead.

Rahab had faith in the Lord (she knew what he could do) and followed this up with a deed (hid the spies). When she done these she was one of Gods people not against God. Being one of Gods people is not what you are born as but what you do with your Faith. Rahab has been Obedient, faithful and followed up with a deed of faithfulness so she has been saved. She is still left outside the camp as she is still not an Israelite.

It would appear that she later became a proselytess. A righteous proselyte was a Gentile who had converted to Judaism, was bound to all the doctrines and precepts of the Jewish economy, and was considered a full member of the Jewish people. She is than able to marry Salmon a Jew and:

Matthew 1:5 Salmon the father of Boaz, whose mother was Rahab, Boaz the father of Obed, whose mother was Ruth, Obed the father of Jesse,

This is one of the 1st examples of a Gentile being saved by Faith.

Here endeth this part of the lesson. More later.

Mucking about with Photos

2008-07-21T22:50:00.002+10:00

Ok more Photo Enrichment.

Original:

And a what I call the Enhanced version:

Repair Wii Sensor Cable

2008-07-07T12:56:00.003+10:00

With our move to a new house it would appear the cable for the Wii sensor bar was broken. We purchased one of those cordless ones (powered by 2 AAA batteries) but I am sick of changing batteries every day (it gets left turned on) and having to have a couple of batteries fully charged at all times.

So finally repaired the cable and it appears to be working OK.

Here be the steps:

1. Cut the cable on both sides of the break.
2. Carefully strip about 3 to 4 cm of the outside covering on both pieces to expose the wires (2 of them a red and gold one) and some white cotton stuff. The 3 to 4 cm is to allow room to play.
3. Cut the white cord off as close to the outer covering as possible and discard.
4. The wires are shielded so the shielding has to be removed. Burn the top 2 cm of the wires with a lighter or match.
5. Carefully scrape the black off the wires (fingernail is a good tool for this).
6. Match the red wires and entwine the exposed bits together as tight as possible - once down double it over and try to get them nice and tight. Do the same to the over wire. Face the wire in opposite directions on the main cable (to stop the wires coming in contact with one and other).
7. Test
8. If working wrap it up with insulation tape ensuring it is a tight fit. Could also put something stiff in to support the join (I used a lollipop stick).

Finished.

Suppose you could also use an empty biro (the bit with the ink in) to form a sleeve over it but this would have to put on one of the wires before stripping and slid up after all joined then taped.

HDR

2008-06-23T08:56:00.004+10:00

Saw something about HDR (High Dynamic Range Imaging) the other day and there are some truly awesome photos out there that have been done with this process.

Thought I would start playing so :

Original

Now I needed to get a couple of photos of this at different exposures (over and under) so used Photoshop to save a couple of copies of this underexposed and overexposed.

Next added the 3 photos together and it was rather grainy so used a filter to remove the grain and finally ended up with this:

Modified

Still not really HDR but has given me food for thought so I am off looking for more photos that can be "manipulated.

Guess I am going to have to start shooting in RAW and bracket my exposures.

Cooked Meal

2008-06-16T23:33:00.001+10:00

Found this while looking for something so had to share it.

What it would look like if men answered an advice column:

Q: My husband wants a threesome with my best friend and me.

A: Obviously your husband cannot get enough of you! Knowing that there is only one of you he can only settle for the next best thing your best friend. Far from being an issue, this can only bring you closer together. Why not get some of your old college roommates involved too? If you are still apprehensive, maybe you should let him be with your friends without you. If you're still not sure then just perform oral sex on him and cook him a nice meal while you think about it.

Q: My husband continually asks me to perform oral sex on him.

A: Do it. Semen can help you lose weight and gives a great glow to your skin. Interestingly, men know this. His offer to allow you to perform oral sex on him is totally selfless. This shows he loves you. The best thing to do is to thank him by performing it twice a day: then cook him a nice meal.

Q: My husband has too many nights out with the boys.

A: This is perfectly natural behavior and it should be encouraged. The man is a hunter and he needs to prove his prowess with other men. A night out chasing young single girls is great stress relief and can foster a more peaceful and relaxing home. Remember, nothing can rekindle your relationship better than the man being away for a day or two (it's great time to clean the house too!) Just look at how emotional and happy he is when he returns to his stable home. The best thing to do when he returns home is for you and your best friend to perform oral sex on him. Then cook him a nice meal.

Q: My husband doesn't know where my clitoris is.

A: Your clitoris is of no concern to your husband. If you must mess with it do it in your own time or ask your best friend to help. You may wish to videotape yourself while doing this, and present it to your husband as a birthday gift. To ease your selfish guilt, perform oral sex on him and cook him a delicious meal.

Q: My husband is uninterested in foreplay.

A: You are a bad person for bringing it up and should seek sensitivity training. Foreplay to man is very stressful and time consuming. Sex should be available to your husband on demand with no pesky requests for foreplay. What this means is that you do not love your man as much as you should; He should never have to work to get you in the mood. Stop being so selfish! Perhaps you can make it up to him by performing oral sex on him and cooking him a nice meal.

Q: My husband always has an orgasm then rolls over and goes to sleep without giving me one.

A: I'm not sure I understand the problem. Perhaps you've forgotten to cook him a nice meal.

Streaming

2008-06-13T18:50:00.002+10:00

Wanted to listen to some of my MP3s on the main sound system but don't want to burn to cd or copy to the Iriver. Also sick of copying single episodes of favourite TV shows to a CD then putting it in the DVD player (it plays DIVX etc).

Some thinking and searching and found a way to stream to the Amp/TV using our wireless network and the WII. Only things required were Winamp and a browser for the WII.

Installed Winamp on my PC and the latest version has a remote plugin that allows you to set your PC as a server to stream to the web. Set that up and created my account on Winamps Orb site, tested with the wired network and all OK. Able to stream Videos and MP3 from my PC to others in the house.

Wii on the internet and had to buy the browser from the WII shop for 500 points ($7.50). Made a favourite page as a page on my server which has a link to the Winamp remote site. Signed in and set to remember and now can watch all those episodes of "Shaun the sheep" and listen to my MP3s.

Good thing about it too is that it defaults back to the home network if we are on the same network so instead of streaming out over the Internet and back it just goes from my wireless access point to the WII so doesn't affect my download/upload.

Very nice

Chicken Soup

2008-06-02T13:03:00.005+10:00

Just made my Winter Chicken Soup and as usual it was bloody great.

After having this wonderful soup (apparently Chickens at various chicken farms have heard about it and Chicken BT666 at Inghams Battery Chook Farm had been heard to say "Micks Chicken soup is to Die for") , I thought I would do a Google on Chicken and Vegetable soup to see if there any recipes the same as mine.

Guess what!

None.

At least in the 1st 17 pages of Google results there were no recipes like mine. "Wot"!! Cries Chicken DH7645 "Are we to end up as Roasts when the True afterlife is to be the main ingredient in Micks Chicken and Vegetable Soup."

Sad day for Chickens.

But no more. I am here to share the secret ("Hurray" from the United Chickens for Soup Liberation Front of Thirlmere).

So for all the people (and Chickens) that have been deprived of the Ultimate Chicken and Vegetable Soup here it is:

Appliances needed:

Pressure Cooker
Slow Cooker
Refrigerator
Stove

Ingedients:

1 Big Chook (Chicken- preferably fresh not frozen)
2 Onions (cut into small pieces)
1/2 a Celery plant (diced)
3 Medium potatoes (diced)
2 Medium Carrots (diced)
1 Turnip (Diced)
1 Parsnip (Diced)
125g Soup Mix
Water
Salt
Pepper

Method.

Chook Preperation:

Remove neck, giblets and fatty chunks from said chook ("I'm not fatty just getting ready to be a KFC pinup" says BFC (Battery Fed Chook) BA672).

Cut the Chook into chunks and place into Pressure Cooker with 750ml water and cook for 1 hr on full pressure. If not using a pressure cooker do it in a boiler for about 3 hrs with water to cover.

Remove the chicken and set aside to cool. Pour liquid into a bowl and refrigerate overnight.

When Chicken is cool remove meat from bones - keep meat and discard bones and stuff. All we need is nice clean chook meat. Refrigerate overnight.

Soak the Soup mix overnight

Next Morning:

Prepare Vegetables and chuck into the slow cooker.
Rinse the Soup Mix and chuck into the Slow Cooker
Break up the Chicken meat and chuck into the Slow Cooker.

Remove the white fat layer from the Chook Liquid and discard. Break the jelly that is left and chuck into the Slow Cooker.

Mix well.

Add water to desired Soup consistency (will thicken so add a bit more) and mix well.

Add Salt and Pepper to taste.

Mix Well.

Cooking.

Set Slow Cooker on high and when boiling turn down to low and simmer all day.

Stir every couple of hours (not required but I like to taste it so it is an excuse to put a spoon in), taste and add salt if required .

Eating.

Serve in bowls with a few crusty rolls, and spoons.

Is better the next day and is OK to freeze.

BUG NOTE.

If worried about bacteria in the start of the slow cooking - use hot water to speed the process so those little fellows don't get a chance to have fun (breed).

Golden Compass

2007-11-27T09:09:00.000+11:00

Saw the shorts for this movie and thought it looked like a good escapist fantasy film so have put it in my list of movies to watch.

Then I receive one of those chain mail emails saying not to watch it because it is anti Christian and that Philip Pullman is an Atheist.

Instead of blindly following what the email said I thought I would do my own research on the subject. So here goes my thoughts.

1. The email was started by the Catholic League of America. They seem to be an extremist group. Even trying to make money by selling a "Why this is a bad movie" pamphlet (electronic download) for $5. Their web site

2. Have yet to find anything by Philip Pullman stating he is an Atheist.

3. Read the books (what a lot of people wouldn't have done) and whilst he does kill God (a very weak God at that) the books are about the triumph of good over evil. The church is very similar to a church of the 15th Century that had the Inquisition and good old witch hunts.

4. The Archbishop of Canterbury finds no problems with the books and has even suggested that they be taught in schools. Wikipedia Entry on the Trilogy

5. Looks like the Catholics do not like anything that goes against Catholic teachings as they also did not like the "Left Behind" series - written by Non Catholics and a Literal interpretation of Revelations.

Anyhow as a Christian I shall watch the movie and urge everyone to read the trilogy "His Dark Materials" with an open mind and if you are Christian your Faith will support you.

Also if you want to swee what people are saying about it try this site a few crazies but interesting

Kid Days

2007-10-15T12:50:00.000+10:00

Just had a couple of days with the Kids at North Durras Staying at Durras Lake North Holiday Park

This Park does not have all the you beaut things like playground, pool, restaurant, bar etc but who needs these? It is quiet, surrounded by rather tall eucalypts, quiet, friendly, close to beach and a easy walking track for the kids. The big advantage for the kids were the Kangaroos and Birds of which there are lots.

Kids enjoyed feeding the birds and also having them in cups......

Photo taken with the trusty Motorola E398 Phone as the CCD of the Camera is stuffed and off to Canon for repairs (the S1 IS not the EOS 400D).

Kids had a fun time and Ashleigh was extremely helpful and did not misbehave and looked after her brother by taking him to the toilet, getting things for him etc.

Great weekend had by all - especially mum who stayed home.

A virus thingy and me

2007-09-28T22:47:00.000+10:00

Found something the other night that I thought might be useful, it consisted of 1 exe file. Downloaded it and ran the file. Nothing popped up to say what it was doing, Hard drive went crazy, icons blinked on desktop (as did everything in explorer) and resources were 100% used.

Rebooted still doing the same. Hmm, possible problem. Took the PC off the network (unplugged the cable). Ran my antivirus but it was locked out of its kernal and also loocked out of the MBR (Master Boot Record) and a lot of other system tools. Possible big problem!

On checking it appears I have installed something that got past my Virus scanner so it is possibly spyware (keylogger more than likely), Installed itself in the MBR so that it will start before everything else and stuffed the Antivirus. Nice.

So to fix I could reformat and reinstall the OS but that would still leave the MBR and still leave Mr bug. Boot from a DOS disk and run FDISK/MBR to rebuild MBR - catch to this is that the drive is a SATA and no DOS drivers. Also I didn't really want to do all that renstalling again.

So have run 3 seperate Anti spyware tools, 2 different antiviruses and a Anti rootkit, each picking up something and deleting it. I still had a problem with the MBR infected. Boot from Windows XP CD and off into my favourite place the "Restore Console" Logon to the Windows on the Hard drive and run "FIXMBR", gave me a summary that the MBR was not standard and did I want to rebuild it - I opted for yes. Exited out and shut my eyes as the PC rebooted (fixing MBRs is not guaranteed success and by the way playing in Restore Console is not for the faint hearted) PC booted and now every anti thingy software I have reports a clean system. PC working normally.

The question is has it gone?????????????

HP eats Rowlings

2007-08-21T22:46:00.000+10:00

These are the words from a comment on my previous post re Harry Potter. And I must thank Sir Cumference for pointing out this very interesting fact.

I wholeheartedly agree that HP's works though somewhat archaic and tedious nowadays have always left me wanting more and looking over my shoulder for that thing that cannot be described.

At least his heros were versed in the Dark Arts (usually had read the Necronomicon by Abdul Alhazred) and Knew how to conjure up the bad guys and usually know how to defeat them.

Harry Yawn Potter would not have stood a chance against Yog Sottoth or even "Nyarlathotep, who fulfills Azathoth's random urges, has intervened more frequently and more directly in human affairs than any other Outer god. He has also displayed more blatant contempt for humanity, especially his own worshippers, than almost any other Lovecraftian deity." (from Wikipedia). Sounds a bit like Voldemort.

Only bad thing about HP is all the crappy movies that have been spawned by his fiction, and I see yet another is released this year (looks crappy from the trailer).

All I can say is:

"Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn"

Boring Hallows - Harry Potter Spoiler

2007-08-06T00:32:00.001+10:00

Just finished reading "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows" (last week actually but had to wait until she who must be obeyed read it) and was struck by the following:

1. The middle was boring - the gading about the countryside setting up camp every day. Thought it was urgent that they find the Horcruxes!

2. It was obvious before this book that Snape was a good guy - didn't he protect Harry from Quirrell during that Quidditch match?

3. Surely there were far too many narrow escapes for kids who didn't know everything about magic.

4. Why didn't the death eaters just Abra Cadaver everyone and be done with it?

5. Harry Potter does not respect his chidren - Albus Severus Potter for instance.

6. Voldemort was a boring adversary - supposed to be rich in knowledge of the dark arts and doesn't help his death eaters. Would you like fries with that?

7. J K Rowling does not like werewolfs.

8. Harry Potter is still a snot.

9. The book was definately made to be a movie.

Speaking of movies, wonder how the room of requirement will be explained as being there seeing Umbridge blew it up in the Order of the Phoenix - Wait I know - Magic.

And also seeing as how how Kreatcher had a small part in the movie and it did not really go into his betrayal how will it be fixed when he turns good guy and leads an army of revolting House Elves to the rescue.

Thats it for now but I might have to revisit this with more silliness.

I enjoyed the book though

No More WORKING for the Man...

2007-07-04T20:43:00.000+10:00

AAAHHHH!!! The sweet taste of retirement. No more fighting traffic to be at a place of employment at a specific time. No more fighting with traffic to get home to the family. No more having to talk to bosses that you really don't want to talk to.

Yes retired to being a housedad where the only things I have to worry about is the kids (Miss 9 and Mr 3 and a half), cleaning, cooking, looking after the yard, washing, ironing, pleasing the wife, running around to various places with the said kids and other duties as time and moods dictate.

HHHMMM!!!

I'm back

2007-02-02T22:17:00.000+11:00

Oh look just over a month since I have been here!

Wonder were I have been? Answer - around looking at things and playing with things (it hasn't fallen off yet).

A new job I want to find and apply for if there are any available " Grave Tamperer Downer"

What is a Grave Tamperer Downer I hear you ask?

Listen closely and I shall be your bird of enlightment.

Have you ever been past a cemetary just after they have put someone in the ground and covered them up? Seen the big mound of dirt still heaped above them?

Well I reckon this needs to patted down to make it nice and snug.

Hence a new job as a "Grave Tamperer Downer"

I could jump up and down on it for a few hours just to make sure it is nice and tight.

Benefits - Exercise, fresh air, don't have to talk to the customer and more (I think).

Imagine having this job - you could go up to people and say to them "When your dead, I am going to go and jump on your grave" (or words to that effect) and quite possibly you could.

Have a nice day and no you cannot have fries with that - they'd go cold!

More on Nits

2007-01-01T23:39:00.000+11:00

If anyone has read some of my previous posts they would have read my bit about nits.

Just been reading something else and discovered that they were the 3rd plague on Egypt from God. :

Ex 8:16-18

16 Then the LORD said to Moses, "Tell Aaron, 'Stretch out your staff and strike the dust of the ground,' and throughout the land of Egypt the dust will become gnats." 17 They did this, and when Aaron stretched out his hand with the staff and struck the dust of the ground, gnats came upon men and animals. All the dust throughout the land of Egypt became gnats. 18 But when the magicians tried to produce gnats by their secret arts, they could not. And the gnats were on men and animals.

(from New International Version)

Commentaries refer to the "gnats" as lice.

Guess we just have to live with them.

Christmas Trees

2006-12-14T19:11:00.000+11:00

Did you know that the Pine tree is a Pagan symbol of fertility?

Wonder why we decorate a Pine tree at Christmas?

What is the significance of December the 25th?

Read on.

Firstly December the 25th.

This is close to the Winter Solstice (Northern hemisphere) so would be the shortest day of the year. After this the days start getting longer or if you like, the sun is reborn.

On this night Virgo is just appearing above the Eastern Horizon and Sirius is high in the sky and would be the brightest star around. So we could say the Sun is being born of a Virgin and a bright star is guiding us.

Many Gods and Dietys are said to have been born on the 25th December and of a virgin. These include Krisna, Hercules, Mithra and Isis. I'll leave Jesus out of this because we know he wasn't born then.

Pine Trees.

As a symbol of fertility they would be used (along with Maypoles anther Phallic symbol) and decorated to signify and hopefully endear goodwill and fertility for the people, coming crops, and livestock. These would be decorated and danced around at the Winter Solstice (December the 25th). Also as an aside guess what word you can make from Pines!

Christians and Pine Trees

About 400AD it was decided to actually celebrate the birth of Jesus but no one was sure of when he was born (I reckon March - April 5BC) so the powers that be decided to use a date that was already in use and as there were a lot of Pagan/Mithra converts they chose the 25th December. Also fits in well with new hope and birth etc.

Hope that was enlightening and if you want to know why I reckon March - April 5BC for the birth of Jesus just ask.

I am still here

2006-11-30T23:48:00.000+11:00

Yep, still around, just a nit on the busy side.

If anyone wants some head lice let me know and I shall post some to you. Probably not get through the post as they would be classed as dangerous goods.

Random Jabbering follows:

Question for today:

Did God empower Satan with creation skills?

I think he did because Head Lice would have been one of things created by such a being.

At least having head lice you always have some friends (fiends) with you.

Head lice have been mutated by the chemical labs to keep them in business as they are just about immune to all the chemicals I have chucked at them in the last few months.

Itchy yet.

Wonder if they (head lice) were invited on the Ark or did they stowaway on Noahs head?

How can blondes have more fun if head lice can be spotted on their heads easier than say a brunettes?

Its all in the Presentation

2006-10-30T22:22:00.000+11:00

Talking to a young girl (I assume she is young) on the phone the other day trying to resolve her computer/mobile phone problems when she says:

"Take this as a compliment, you have a really hot voice."

Well knowing I had not had any chillies for a while and the cheese and hot English mustard sandwich for lunch was 2 hours away I was a tad taken back and had a bit of a laugh and answered as non hotly as I could:

"You have just made a 54 year old blokes day and you also must have bad hearing".

To which she replied:

"No I mean it, you sound really hot and your not 54 are you, you don't sound it".

Anyway I fixed her problem (the computer/phone not her hearing), found out she lived in Northern Queensland so a quick trip to visit her before going home was out of the question.

Before we finished talking she again boosted my head size:

" I hope you have a really nice day and I mean what I said - you do have a really hot voice"

The boys I work with thought it rather amusing and I now refer to myself as Mr Hot Voice - as is my right.

2006-10-25T21:17:00.000+10:00

The hand as it now looks. One straight little finger. And it works as well.

2006-10-11T23:51:00.000+10:00

Chicken Sexing

Ever wonder what a Chicken sexer does? I do and have come up with the Mad Mick version of Chicken sexing.

So a chicken sexer sits in a chair in front of a conveyor belt with chickens on it (the conveyor belt that is). He reaches out with his left hand and grabs a chicken and turns it upside down. With his right hand he reaches into the conveniently placed bucket beside him and retrieves 1 set of chicken genitals which he then applies araldite to - from a nozzle which releases a predetermined amount of said bonding agent when his hand passes by it - then attaches the aformentioned genitals to the chicken. hence "Chicken Sexer".

I hope it is not different in the real world

2006-09-29T13:30:00.000+10:00

Stitches!!

For those who wanted to see what my hand loks like without the wrappings here it is!.......
Not too bad. Now have a small bandage and have to exercise the hand every hour (5 minutes of making it into a fist) so it doesn't seize up.

Picture of the Abercrombie River below was taken by me many years ago, I had the camera (and old Ricoh) set up on the tripod in the midle of the river to get take it. Water was only dangly appendage high so not too much of a problem. Was taken on ISO 50 slide for about 4 secs. A bit of touch up in photoshop just to clean it.

2006-09-25T20:56:00.000+10:00

Abercrombie River

2006-09-24T22:21:00.000+10:00

Thank you well wishers for asking about my hand. Not a great deal of pain (not since I stopped grabbing things with it and back handing Sharon) - gone off the panadiene forte (except at snooze time). Must be all the good healing vibes floating around the ether that are helping the recovery.

Actually the hand will be mummified for about 2 weeks (well it does look like it belongs to Boris Karloff) then limited use for a few more weeks so will be relying on my lovely wife (crawl) to assist in a few things. Has not hindered the mummy/daddy thing too much!

At least it is not as bad a what a friend had when he crushed his right hand. Had both arms sewn together for quite a while and couldn't wipe his own bum - that I couldn't handle - especially after a good curry.

Lee, haven't seen what sort of sewing was done but know it will be zig zag pattern (to stop splitting) and rather long going by what the Dr drew on my hand. Oh yeah Lee nice photos on your site, I am now depressed.

2006-09-24T17:09:00.000+10:00

I now have my left hand bandaged with just the finger tips showing through and a chunk of plaster running along the back of my arm from finger tips to three quarters of the way to my elbow. All bandaged.

The reason? On Thursday had an operation on my hand to correct something called "dupuytren's contracture" which was affecting my left little finger. Some information on this condition can be found here with some photos of before and after hands.

The hand is out of action for about 2 weeks so that means I shall be doing less work around the house but will probably have to do double when it is OK. Still doesn't get me out of dog crap patrol though.

A small pic of my hand

2006-09-18T20:13:00.000+10:00

One of lifes little surprises:

Whipper snipping the grass and runing into a recent dog dropping that is still moist. Its amazing how far up your legs it will travel. Don't try this if you are faint hearted and hate the idea of lots of smelly brown spots all over you. Luckily the hose was handy.

And another one:

Taking the lid of the skimmer box of the pool and finding a frog swimming in it. Frog is released back into the bit of a mess behind the pool. Few hours later find the dogs playing with a dead frog.

I think there is an endless list of these things and could probably add a couple day if pressed.

Comment from a bloke at work today about someone being skinny " He's as skinny as a Jew in 1945". We all agreed that this person would not go to hell as it would be to good for him, but instead go to hells basement to stoke the fires.

2006-09-13T19:53:00.000+10:00

Patrol Definition:

pa·trol

1. The act of moving about an area especially by an authorized and trained person or group, for purposes of observation, inspection, or security.

2. A person or group of persons who perform such an act.

a. A military unit sent out on a reconnaissance or combat mission.

b. One or more military vehicles, boats, ships, or aircraft assigned to guard or reconnoiter a given area.

4. A division of a Boy Scout troop or Girl Scout troop consisting of between six and eight children.

So to Patrol one has to be moving.

Why then do we see Highway Patrol cars lurking behind bushes and the driver of the vehicle either standing near it with a radar gun pointed in our direction or quietly sitting there with a camera pointed in our direction.

Surely they are not doing the job they are paid for ie. Patrolling, and should be sacked. I mean it is our money paying their wages and I would expect them to do the job they are paid for.

If the Police were serious about stopping drivers from speeding there would be no cameras, radars, unmarked police cars etc. All Highway Patrol Cars would be painted Fluro pink or some other very visible colour and would be driven up and down the roadways. That way they would be visible and seen to be doing the job they are paid for. We would see them and adjust our speed accordingly thus cutting down on speeding accidents.

Maybe the ones we see beside the road should be called "Highway Lurkers".

I think it is time we the taxpayers demanded that the police do the job they are paid for.

2006-09-10T00:01:00.000+10:00

Three great Australians we have lost in the last couple of weeks.

1.

Don "Keep the Bastards honest" Chipp
21 August 1925 - August 28, 2006

Steve "Crocodile Hunter" Irwin
22 February 1962 - 04 September 2006

Peter "Perfect" Brock
26 February 1945 - 9th September 2006

RIP Brothers

2006-09-08T22:51:00.000+10:00

Well now that I got past the Beta thing I can post on here again.

Trouble is I don't have a lot to say.

DNA - marvellous thing, wonder what the probability of it being created at random is?

Atoms - lifeless little things that we cannot see except with a rather large microscope.

Humans - living being made up of squillions of lifeless atoms which also make up DNA.

Wonder if they care about us or just use us or do we use the atoms?

2006-07-30T22:46:00.000+10:00

Bloke below is the one and only Frank Zappa.

Anyone ever wonder how big the Universe is, if it has an end and also how insignifigent we are?

If we look at it on say the scale of Earth being an electron of an atom in the engine block of a car then would we know we were part of an engine block? Would we even know that a "Supreme Being" or a consortium of "Supreme Beings" had created our Universe.

Maybe our Big Bang would have been the blast furnace (if the block was cast iron).

Think about it and I'll continue later.

2006-07-23T18:45:00.000+10:00

Greatest musician/compser of the 20th Century (see Blog below) composed a song titled "Prelude to the Afternoon of a Sexually Aroused Gas Mask". This song appeared on an Ablum entitled "Weasels Ripped My Flesh". Also had another great song titled "Billy the Mountain" about a mountain going on vacation with his wife Ethel (who was tree growing out of his shoulder).

Done some great stuff with the London Philharmonic mob, orchestral arrangements of various pieces of his music and a version of Stairway to Heaven.

He is not alive anymore and it was from drugs as he never indulged.

Stay tuned for who he is and later on Micks expose on Creation/Evolution and all that stuff. Here is a sample:

"In the beginning ........"

2006-07-22T16:06:00.000+10:00

Found this picture of the greatest musician of the 20th Century. Now just need to find a picture of the asteroid named after him.

Any guesses who he is?

Hint, Daughter could be an object in space and Son sounds a bit like a rodent (he is also a bloody good musician in his fathers steps).

Another Hint. Norman Gunstan played on stage with this person in Sydney during a tour.

Found the Asteroid.

2006-07-21T22:11:00.000+10:00

OK enough geekiness then (thank you Mrs wife). And I made a really great discovery today with VBA and Excel that I wanted to share.

Guess Ill just have to share this one from Spike Milligan. It is titled :

"A Poem For The Lonely"

Hello.

2006-07-20T17:41:00.000+10:00

One of my favourite Functions in Excel and I thought I would share it:

A while ago I found a great Function in Excel called SUMPRODUCT. This allowed me to SUM columns based on multiple criteria as opposed to one using SUMIF (only 1 criteria). Also got rid of the necessity of using SHIFT – CTRL – ENTER to enter an Array formula (as I would invariably forget if I edited the formula).

This function is great but like arrays it slows the spreadsheet down (takes longer to calculate). Also the range has to be specified so you cannot just select the whole Column to sum (like ARRAYS). This causes problems when the data you are calculating comes from columns whose range is likely to change.

So another great Function to add to the SUMPRODUCT is INDIRECT. This basically turns your range into text so it will never change.

An example:

=IF(C31>0,(((SUMPRODUCT((INDIRECT("'Data Sheet'!$O$2:$O$8000")=C1)*(INDIRECT("'Data Sheet'!$E$2:$E$8000")=10142)*INDIRECT("'Data Sheet'!$J$2:$J$8000")))+(SUMPRODUCT((INDIRECT("'Data Sheet'!$O$2:$O$8000")=C1)*(INDIRECT("'Data Sheet'!$E$2:$E$8000")=10142)*INDIRECT("'Data Sheet'!$H$2:$H$8000"))))/C31),0))

This is nested in an IF statement and is basically 2 SUMPRODUCTS added together and then divided by C31 IF C31 is greater than 0. If C31 is less than or equal to 0 then 0 is returned to the cell. As you can see each SUMPRODUCT will add values in columns J and H respectively if certain criteria are met in Columns O and E. Of course more criteria can be added if required

Pretty nifty BUT having 700 of these or similar gives me time to go and have a leak, have a smoke and a cup of coffee while the Spreadsheet is calculating. Also trying to figure out where to put the parentheses is a bit of a nightmare. I got each SUMPRODUCT to work independently, then added the INDIRECT, put them together then added the IF statement.

Nice solution and impresses people when they look at your spreadsheet They tend to think you know a lot.

2006-07-18T20:56:00.000+10:00

Found a use for paddle pop sticks other than keeping things up. I wonder if they would miss one?

When you think about it its pretty amazing that they cut down trees to make things we can stick in our mouths ie paddle pop sticks and tooth picks. Suppose they have to trim them as it would be a bit hard sticking a tree in your mouth (unless your name is Linda Lovelace). Reminds me of something that the great Spike Milligan once wrote:

"When I stand I am 6 foot. When I sit I an 3 foot 3.
Do they really cut down trees to make me smaller"

2006-07-17T21:27:00.000+10:00

OK! Might as well jump on the bandwagon and start a blog. Though when I think about it is a good place to store the little bits and pieces our minds pick up so a tired old brain doesn't have to keep them. I could opt for doing it in SQL server but am a bit lazy so will do that one day when I get motivated - probably just before I turn my toes up.

What to expect on here!!

Not sure and it will probably be unexpected (even by me). Maybe a laugh or 2, some links that I find interesting, no nudes (unless they are exceptionally funny and then only links).

So thats set the premise now lets see if I can keep it up (where's that paddle pop stick).